#5 - Leaping Like Salman's

Happy Sunday! I hope you've aal had a canny weekend - whatever difference that makes for many these days. Nonetheless, just be happy you're here!

Now, let us just forget that I've not bothered me arse to write for a few weeks. 😏

So first and foremost, thanks once again to the two Tom's who made their debut's last time out! From the feedback received it was a worthwhile edition to the blog and something that I aim to feature again moving forward (wherever feasible). And on that subject of feedback, thanks to all those who've provided both support to myself and guest writers in recent weeks, and those whom have made suggestions on how to improve the blog - it's greatly appreciated.

With that in mind, I've sought to follow that advice and in this edition I have dabbled with the use of videos and/or voice recordings in an attempt to make this more accessible. As you will also notice, this edition is void of a "Pillar to Post", that will follow in a separate edition later this week, to hopefully make each blog more digestible. 

So without further ado, welcome back to...

Keegan's Corner

and...as-salaam alaikum (peace be unto you) for the Ashley era may finally be over!

 Alreet....alreet...

So before we gan radge (and undoubtedly the desire to do so is there), let's take a moment to reflect on what's been a funny auld time at Newcastle United, under the ownership of Mike Ashley. Firstly, with the realisation that we've been here before - many a time. It's far from a done deal and it ain't over until the fat...🤔...gadgy, is singing. We all want to believe, (of course we do), that this is finally the end - Saudi funding or otherwise. But we'd be wise to hold off on some of that excitement until the deal is done. # cansaway

(What an absolute cringe of a phrase by the way, just like #limbs and #lads...)

Anyhoo, let's not forget, that whilst this is and always will be our club, this was also Ashley's cash cow, until Rafa Benitez and COVID-19.

To shine some additional light - the Corona virus has caused everywhere to have an economic downturn, apart from maybe supermarkets and medicine. In addition, Rafa Benitez united, United, everywhere but the boardroom. For that, the true owners of the club i.e. any reasonable Newcastle United supporter, will be forever grateful (irrespective of the style of football played). It was a stake that was firmly placed in the ground as both fan groups and individuals could finally draw a line in the sand and say "we back this man or we don't go back".

The Rafa Benitez reign started in a season where we ended up an almost certainty to be relegated, with our band of merry mercenaries and a clueless McClaren unable to motivate the dressing room. A fan base apathetic about it all, as it had been here before, and little to be excited about other than getting more for next seasons money with an additional 5 home games. His arrival sparked a renewed hope and belief for the supporters which resulted in some much needed positivity both on the pitch and in the stands. Some good results followed but not enough to keep us in the Premier League.

Image courtesy of the Shields Gazette

The final game of that season vs Tottenham Hotspur must have been memorable for Rafa, as the crowd didn't stop all game. Endless renditions of Rafa Benitez songs such as the adaptation of  Los Lobos' "La Bamba" ringed out and a simple "Rafa-Rafael..." song that surely pulled on the heart strings and resulted in two additional years of his leadership. But...rather than me sit here and waffle on about how much I loved Benitez, let's cut to the chase - he simply wasn't backed. This resulted in increased fan unrest and many people following the stance of fan group "If Rafa Goes We Go". It's exactly what it says on the tin. Circa 10k season ticket holders jacked it in last summer, myself being just one of them - a head over heart decision which was massively unusual for me. We owe a lot to that "anonymous" group, simply for being just that, and acting as a non-ego-driven entity and subsequent catalyst to the most significant, fan-led, anti-Ashley protest action in the 13 year custodianship (we hope!).

As just one of those protestors / boycotters it'd be fantastic to attribute some of those efforts (and the efforts of those who stood shoulder to shoulder with me) as the main source for this potential outcome. Yet, the reality is that bad business decisions - both in retail and in football, have driven Ashley into a corner. In the last 13 years here are just some of the wrong-doings, misdemeanours and errors that have occurred under his watch:

Sports Direct

• Paying warehouse staff under the national minimum wage

• Forced to pay back £1million in wages stolen from staff

• Employed the UK's most vulnerable staff on zero hour contracts

• Had a 6 strike policy leaving staff feeling oppressed and fearful for their jobs

• 75 ambulances called to the main warehouse in under 2 years with one woman giving birth to her child in the toilet as she was "afraid to miss her shift"

• Labelled in the FTSE 350 as the most unethical company

• Snubbed an order for him to attend the houses of parliament for review of his companies' ethics

• Staff members being sacked for being ill for a fortnight

• Attempted to keep stores open despite a country-wide lock down for non-essential work during the COVID-19 pandemic

Newcastle United

• Free advertising of his own company and subsequent rebranding of St James' Park with zero profit to Newcastle United

• Reduction in commercial revenue growth

• Refusal to back Alan Pardew following a successful season where we finished 5th, and consolidate our position towards the top end of the table
• Accused of "repeatedly and intentionally misleading the press, public and fans of Newcastle United" in court, by a tribunal panel

• Ordered to pay £2million in compensation to NUFC fans' favourite Kevin Keegan for unfair dismissal

• Appointment of inadequate directors, managers and head coaches (e.g. Lee Charnley, Joe Kinnear, John Carver and Steve McClaren) 

• Refusal to back Rafa Benitez resulting in him walking at the end of his contract

• Personal purchase and resale of Strawberry Place land from the club prohibiting the clubs future use

I've deliberately left out some of the points that are slightly more disputable, but all in all the blokes been a reet arsewipe. I mean it goes without saying that, the 'Fat Cockney Bastard' has gone from being a beer-guzzling, fun loving, 'fellow fan' to being a negligent, ignorant, money-sucking leech - siphoning the cash out of our club whilst he attempts to revive his retail empire.

Image courtesy of Google

Even just to look at the Sports Direct share price from the last 5 years tells you it's own story (see right).

I mean, I'm no reader of the stock market or experienced business man, but I'd think if he wants to be the hero of the high street, now might be a good time to cash in on his cow, take his milk and piss off.

Should he buy back more of the Fraser Group (formerly Sports Direct) shares whilst it's at a recent-time low. Then once we get out of the pandemic and back to normality, he could theoretically sell those shares again at a profit, enabling him the opportunity to buy up more of the high street and run them into the ground too.

Let's just hope he doesn't continue to take the piss out of your every day Joe Blogg on the way. It's not good practice or best placed to wish ill on others, but honestly - if he loses all his wealth and ends up in a position where he has to feed his family with a zero-hour contract on less than minimum wage, it'll be a smile on my face and karma well served.

This brings me nicely to the first "...Take From A Fellow Taty" contribution:

A Take From A Fellow Taty...(#1)

False Dawns

As someone who has supported Newcastle United since the age of 6 or 7 years old, I had always wanted a season ticket. Unfortunately (for me), there wasn't the opportunity until in later life when I could potentially afford my own. My parents, whilst they were interested in how we were doing, never really had the desire or indeed spare cash to spend such amounts on tickets for the club I love. I got my first job at 16, and began getting myself set up in life - paying for driving lessons, and looking towards having my own car, which I achieved just shortly after. By such time Ashley was in talks to buy the club and a new era of hope had begun for us - could we push to be league winners and really be the club I thought we could be?

It was at Blackburn away that I met my (now) wife, who is originally from Darlington. She received a place at Leeds university shortly after we met and subsequently, I spent my time both travelling and being with her at weekends. Upon the end of her course, things had already began to turn sour for the Toon. Ashley had already began playing up and I took the decision at this point to place a personal stake in the ground. I would not buy a season ticket under his regime. Why start under him, if I'd lasted this long before? For the club that I identified myself with as a youngster and grew to love was no longer the same. It was harder to identify with and harder to connect and subsequently my interest dwindled. But I promise myself that when he eventually goes, I'll be getting myself to St James' Park regularly. The hope that one day I will once again have a club with ambition and a drive to do well is something I will always want to be part of and if that means going to the ground week-in-week-out, it would be an added bonus.

Image courtesy of the Evening Chronicle

Over the years there have been a number of alleged takeover approaches and renewed hope that the good days may be returning, only for each approach to disintegrate into nothing. A lot of people seem to be getting extremely excited about the latest takeover news and although I do believe there is something happening, I can't help but feel it all sounds too good to be true. I'm trying to keep away from any article that discusses the potential takeover as I don't want to allow myself to fall into the same trap as we all had previously with other takeover gossip, only to be left disheartened and somewhat embarrassed.

Ultimately a takeover is what the club needs, whether that be with those who seem to be actively trying to buy the club or someone else in the future. The fans have been dragged through a mixture of emotions and I believe a takeover will bring the fan base together once again and lead to a brighter and more prosperous future for NUFC.

Alex

Having known Alex for a little over half of my life, I know of his desire and love for Newcastle. To grace us with his ugly mug on a regular basis at the match would be an absolute joy, as those match days build memories that occasionally last a lifetime - if the bottles of dog don't send you barking mad!

It's hard to argue with much of what he has said - we briefly debated the other day how and why fans could be as excited as they are. With a somewhat un-calculated and controversial opinion, I claimed that when you've invested as much time and money in as some people, you have every right to be like a kid in a candy shop, which is different to looking on from home. The conversation intensified but I think the decision was mutually taken to avoid the whole super-fan debate, as frankly there's nowt more tedious. We both know what it means to one another and we know better than to make enemies of friends (so to speak). Something we both wish the Newcastle fans realised years ago and we may have arrived at this juncture sooner.

How disjointed have we been man?! At least we can hopefully let bygones be bygones and move forward.

After all...

Image courtesy of The Mirror

So...in the fight to remove our odious owner, the men (and women) of morality repeatedly banged the drum of discontent at how Ashley treated his staff in the retail sector, joining forces at times with political and human-rights activists. That same drum wasn't heard by many. Ironic that we should now be owned by Saudi's who possibly pip people to the post on that front. I guess for the most part that battle for morality was a battle of convenience. I'm not gonna lie - it was for me. I was fighting for my football club primarily, but sometimes you have to fight smart and not hard. The pin-prick from all sides was always the best way to get at Ashley, hit him from all angles, and hope that how you hit gets harder in time. However, if this it "it" then the hypocrisy I discussed in earlier editions lies firmly at my door.

Am I arsed about the human rights violations committed by the Saudi's. Aye. It's dogshit. Like, you'd have to be a reet bell-end to not realise that. Am I arsed enough to campaign about it when the Toon are banging 8 passed Everton? Nah, am I shite. I doubt many would be if they were truthful to themselves, Toon fans or otherwise.

It's interesting that this has become such an issue in the media's reporting of the alleged takeover. The same media who've ignored the FCB's human rights violations and ethics for over a decade and the same media who've allowed him to spout whatever propaganda he wishes about the club. What's a matter? Is your club gonna be potentially blown out the financial water? Is the issue that it's not your club potentially having access to this level of wealth? Course it is.  The mainstream media report what suits their agenda and a North Eastern powerhouse, football or otherwise is a headache for those in the South, but don't worry - should they be worse than Ashley, I'll be back out with my flags and banners, cause this club, this city, is ours.

The issue isn't the purchase of Newcastle United. The issue is the purchasing of arms and oil, the purchasing of pretty much owt you watch or touch by other corrupt governments and countries violating human rights. Or how about the purchase of the Premier League that's been ongoing for decades and that is now happening with boxing and formula one. That's right, you, the media are  complicit in taking sport from the people. So evaluate your own morality instead of massacring mine. 

Time for a breather...🤣

[🤔...M'bappe or Messi...hmmmmm both...errrrrr...🤔]

...and now for this editions second contribution...

A Take From A Fellow Taty...(#2)

Murderous Mags?

For a long time now, we have dreamt of the day Mike Ashley sells Newcastle United Football Club and we can get back to just loving our football club in its entirety once again.  

As expected with Newcastle United, any stories that emerge from NE1 they are covered in controversy. Some of it may be justified, some of it not, but one thing is for sure, I want this takeover to go through. It’s a chance for a fresh start, and yes fans of Newcastle United have said that every single time the name above the door has changed, but this one is desperately needed.  

Naturally, fans are dreaming of what could be with the money rumoured to be associated with the new owners, but if one thing I've learned following Newcastle United over the decades is that we are not allowed nice things! Part of me is expecting this entire thing to go tits up. 

One thing I won’t be commenting on is what every journalist seems to want an answer, the Saudi Arabian regime. I’m not qualified enough to discuss it, I’m a football fan. As someone I know rightly pointed out, we can’t even get Sky to stop playing us away from home on Monday Night Football. What on earth am I going to achieve with discussing political regimes?  

I care about Newcastle, I care about where I’ll be travelling to watch Newcastle in the Champions League Final in 2 years time. Ok, I’m getting carried away.  

I do care about the progression of Newcastle United and to see the club striving to be the best it can be. If someone wants to make millions on the side of that, fine. As long as my football club is serving its community and helping better the lives of many in the community then that’s good enough for me. 

If you want to ask about political regimes, ask the government. 

Who knows when we’ll be able to see Newcastle United again live in person, but when I do, I want all of my pals there, I want to have spent hundreds on club merchandise, I want to be amongst the best atmosphere putting on a huge display for Wor Flags again and not having to worry about what Mike fucking Ashley is going to do to ruin any good moments. 

Let us enjoy what might be.

Thomas

I thought there'd be nowt else for me to add to that but I suppose...

Finally...

....as previously mentioned - whilst it'd be nice to attribute the potential departure of the Fat Cockney Bastard largely to the protestors and boycotters, it isn't the case. Nevertheless - it has helped. It's taught me that, sometimes when no-one else believes they can make a difference, you can. Engage, motivate those who share your views, network, sacrifice, do all in your power (or all the power that you can reasonably apply) and you might reap the rewards in the end.

Failure is not defined by trying and not succeeding, failure is failing to try.

With all this discussion of change of ownership and the misdemeanours of Mike, I'd like to end with an image from a goal that, is not only one of my favourites in recent times, but also depicts the Ashley Era. A goal which helped keep us in the division and remaining mediocre. A goal scored by someone who was shit on by the club as he fought with cancer. A goal that questioned the ownership and coaching staff at the time. Ladies and gentleman I give you Jonas Gutierrez 👏👏👏

Ciao for now ;)